I turned fifty-seven this year and with sixty on the near horizon, my thoughts have more than ever turned to aging and what it means to me. I find myself marveling at how fast days become weeks, months, years, and decades. Doing the math with my memories frequently shocks me – as in, “It’s been fifteen years since I broke up with him?!,” “My mom died nineteen years ago?!,” “Whose face is that in my mirror?!,” “What exactly is retinol, anyway?!,” and so on…
There’s a scene in the acclaimed 2001 HBO World War II series “Band of Brothers” based on the book by Stephen Ambrose which takes place toward the end of war that has captured my attention. At this point in the war the by now seasoned soldiers of Easy Company are being led into a battle by Lt. Dike, a largely ineffectual leader who has failed to earn the trust of his men.
“Rarely has humanity faced such a convergence of challenges to its survival and its spiritual integrity. The changes that are upon us will demand an unprecedented degree of emotional maturity and spiritual commitment. Those who choose to be in the vanguard, leading humanity through these changes, will shoulder an enormous responsibility for the way in which they support others in their search for wholeness during this great transformation.” — Spotted Eagle
“There is no passion to be found in settling for a life that is less than the one you are capable of living.” ~ Nelson Mandela
When I was around twenty or so my father cautiously asked me what I thought I might want to do with my life. His question just sort of lay there between us like a big blob of alien slime.
So often we drift through our days in various states of trance-like distraction and habit of thought and action. Then there are times when all that falls away and we find ourselves very much alert to the raw power of our core fears.
The other day I was having a conversation with a group of friends about ‘evil.’ Most of us had strong definitions and opinions on the subject, calling up various personal and historical examples of violence, hatred, exploitation, atrocity and abuse to make our points. What didn’t come so easily was what, if anything, to do about it? How to process our emotions around it? Where and how to place this concept in our world view?
When we speak of what we want out of life, we are tapping into the powerful spiritual principles of intention, attention, and tension. I have found that much of the process of actualizing what we want tends to focus on the forms we desire our lives to take, which, while oh so tempting, is more a function of employing our imagination in the service of fear and fantasy than in our desire for growth.
One of the rallying points of the recent ‘Occupy Wall Street’ movement is the distinction drawn between the majority of the population, or the 99%, and how, in comparison, the vast concentration of wealth in the world is owned by a very few, or the 1%. While I find the movement’s message compelling, there’s something about the ‘Us vs. Them’ theme that bugs me.
Writer and Buddhist meditation teacher Susan Piver recently posed the question on facebook: “What do you think would happen if just for one hour, you stopped trying so hard?” Subsequent comments were both humorous and poignant. Here are a few that stood out for me:
Trust. How does that word land with you? Chances are, if your life experience is anything like mine, there’s an immediate emotional charge around the word – loaded with meaning and memory. Much like money, we speak of trust as something of worth, something that is gained, earned, given, and /or withdrawn. If I’m feeling too vulnerable I can tip out of power and become defensive.
